


There is No Road Through the Woods

by piratequeenofgreenthings



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-23
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2020-09-25 00:41:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20367790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/piratequeenofgreenthings/pseuds/piratequeenofgreenthings
Summary: Catelyn didn’t mean for it to happen, didn’t mean to lose her temper, it just happened. Jon just happened to be the person she took her temper out on that day. Everything just got all too much, all of Catelyn’s senses were overwhelmed, and all Jon did was say her name. Just to get her attention. But it was the breaking point and the straw that broke Catelyn’s back.After an argument with Catelyn, Jon runs away, gets lost and ends up with Mance Rayder north of the border where he meets Tormund and Ygritte. Back in Winterfell, his parents are beside themselves with worry while Ned begins to wonder if keeping the truth about Jon's parent's a secret was successful.





	1. Chapter 1

Ned was away on a business trip when it happened. Catelyn didn’t mean for it to happen, didn’t mean to lose her temper, it just happened. Jon just happened to be the person she took her temper out on that day. She was already stressed, Ned had been away for almost two weeks- the longest he’d ever been away from home discounting his military days- Arya and Sansa hadn’t stopped arguing, Bran wouldn’t stop climbing on everything, Rickon had started having night terrors and Robb, well Robb was having a bad day. Everything just got all too much, all of Catelyn’s senses were overwhelmed, Sansa was chasing Arya screaming at her, Rickon was crying, Bran was climbing over something, Robb was complaining about something or other and all Jon did was say her name. Just to get her attention. But it was the breaking point and the straw that broke Catelyn’s back. So, she yelled, yelled at Jon, she couldn’t even remember what she had said but she remembered the look on Jon’s face and the way her children went deadly silent. So silent you could have heard a pin drop. Jon froze, just for a second, just long enough for Catelyn to see the damage she had done. But before the apology was out of her mouth, Jon bolted. He ran and he ran fast, Catelyn remembered vaguely at that moment that he had been the best sprinter at his sports day the previous summer, better than Robb even. She distantly heard the front door open and slam but that was enough to snap her into action and she ran after him yelling for him to come back but he was already gone, she ran up the length of their street but she couldn’t see him anywhere.

She piled the other children into the car quickly and began driving around the neighbourhood slowly trying to catch a glimpse of him. She called Benjen, she called the Greyjoy household, called the Tarly’s, the Tyrell’s, and when she became desperate the Baratheon-Lannister’s but no one had seen him. That was when she called the police.  
The police turned up and began asking her questions. Catelyn answered them as best as she could; ‘yes’, ‘no’, ‘he’s never done this before’, ‘thirteen, curly, dark hair, around five-four’, ‘he just ran I didn’t see where he went.’  
She called Ned who got on the first flight out of Braavos despite having six more days to fulfil on his trip. He didn’t say much on the phone but Catelyn knew that he was angry, he’d never been impressed with the way she treated Jon; ‘you’re a fantastic mother to our other children, Cat, why can’t you do the same with Jon?’ He would ask.  
‘Because Jon is your son, not mine.’ She would say but if she was honest with herself, really honest, she was distraught right now. Almost as distraught as she would have been had it been Robb who was missing, after all, she was the person who had nursed Jon when he was sick, soothed his scabbed knees, the person to reassure him that monsters didn’t live underneath his bed, she had done all of this and more. The thought of him all alone out there was enough to break her heart.

*********

Jon stumbled through the fields, his teeth chattering as he went, this was the North and it was February and it was almost night time. He had no idea where he was when he first started running his only intention was to get as far away as possible. He was upset and his only instinct was to get away but the village of Winterfell was very rural and he quickly realised he had run outside of the village into an area he did not recognize, he decided that if he kept walking that eventually, he would find his way back home. That wasn’t the case and now it was almost dark and he was freezing and exhausted, he could feel his legs giving up with every step he took. His left leg ached horribly; he’d cut it on an old nail that had been poking out of the stile he had just climbed over. There was a light in the distance and what seemed to be a farmhouse, he sped up hoping someone was in and he could call Catelyn, hope she wasn’t too mad that he had run away and he would be home in time for tea. The door to the farmhouse opened and a young girl carrying a shotgun appeared, Jon thought she might have shouted something but he couldn’t be sure as all he could hear was a ringing in his ears and all he could see were bright spots before he collapsed.

*********

Ned hardly said a word when he got in late that night, Catelyn heard the front door click softly shut and Ned’s soft footsteps up the stairs. He pushed open their bedroom door and saw Catelyn in their bed surrounded by all of their children.

‘I’ll go sleep in the guest room.’ He muttered and backed out of their room, avoiding eye contact.

‘Ned, wait.’ Catelyn whispered trying to get out of the bed but the minute she moved, Sansa shifted in her sleep mumbling under her breath and Ned was already gone.

He didn’t say anything that morning either, it was a Monday and the children would usually be at school but Catelyn had seen fit to keep them home. The school said it was ‘extenuating circumstances’, Arya was sat in the corner of the living room her knees pulled up tightly to her chest, she didn’t cry but Catelyn had spotted the way her bottom lip trembled ever so often before she composed herself. Sansa sat, white-faced and stiff, on the edge of the sofa her hands clasped tightly in her lap. Robb from a glance seemed casual as he lounged on the sofa opposite Sansa but Catelyn could see the tension in his shoulders and the way he obsessively bit at his nails and the skin around them. Rickon was sat by the family dog, Ice, combing his chubby toddler fingers through his fur, he knew something was wrong but he wasn’t sure what. Meanwhile, Bran wasn’t even inside, the minute he’d gotten out of bed he’d climbed the large oak tree in their back garden up into his treehouse where he had been all day. No one was saying anything they all just sat anxiously, everyone’s eyes flicking to the landline every so often hoping it would ring with some news. It never did.

Ned’s silent treatment was becoming too much for Catelyn and she tapped him on the shoulder nodding her head towards the kitchen where they were less likely to be heard by the children and she shut the door behind them.

‘What do you want Cat?’ Ned asked wearily, he didn’t look as though he’d slept a wink.

‘I want us to talk, Ned. You’ve barely spoken to me since you got home.’

‘I don’t know what you want me to say.’

‘I don’t know, something, anything! Just talk to me, Ned, I’m your wife please don’t shut me out.’

‘Fine, I’ll say something. I am angry, Cat, angrier than I’ve ever been. My son is missing and it’s your fault. I trusted you with him and you lost him.’

‘Do you think that I don’t think about that at every minute? If I could go back and change it, I would, Ned the second the words were out of my mouth I wanted to take them back but Jon’s a fast runner. It was like one minute he was there and the next he wasn’t.’

‘He’s thirteen, Catelyn! He’s not Carl Lewis, he can’t be that fast. Honestly, I’m beginning to think you didn’t want to find him.’

‘How dare you, Ned Stark.’ Catelyn’s voice was deathly quiet and teeming with rage.

‘It’s true though, you never wanted him. You always treated him differently.’

‘No, I didn’t want him, because he’s the product of your affair not because I hate him. I admit I have not been the kindest to him and it is a source of great shame for me but don’t you dare act like I wanted this to happen. I am going out of mind with worry at the thought of him out there all alone. And for what it’s worth, I may not have wanted him but at least I’m there for him.’

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’ Ned was raising his voice now.

‘Who nursed him when he was ill, who went in every night and checked for monsters under his bed, who sat with him reading when we first found out about his dyslexia? I don’t remember you being there for a lot of it.’

‘We were at war, Catelyn!’

‘The war ended nine years ago, Ned!’

‘Alright, but you didn’t do any of it lovingly and I recall that Jon much preferred it when I helped him with his reading.’

‘Because you’re his father, Ned, and he never sees you! You’re always away leaving me to juggle everything, you try looking after six children by yourself for once. The fact of the matter is this wouldn’t have happened if you were home.’

‘Don’t try and shift the blame onto me, Cat.’

And with that their conversation was over as Ned went to leave, he flung open the door and there on the other side was Sansa her eyes wide and her hand poised to knock on the door. Ned and Catelyn both froze, how much did she hear? Catelyn wondered.

‘Is there news?’ Ned asked and Catelyn heard the tremble in his voice but Sansa only shook her head.

‘N-no,’ She stuttered, ‘it’s snowing.’

Catelyn’s heart dropped, normally they would be excited for snow but not today, not on this day. She began praying desperately as she and Ned rushed to the window, please, please let him be somewhere safe, let him be found sure enough it was snowing and snowing heavily. She and Ned looked at each other slowly both of them aware of the implications of this turn in the weather.

‘I’m going to get Bran to come inside.’ Catelyn said eventually, it was all she could do really.

*********

Jon awoke as a man was carrying him inside the farmhouse, he tried to speak but he was so tired and cold he couldn’t manage to form any words. He drifted in and out of sleep over the next few hours enough to catch snippets of conversations. He was in a warm farmhouse laid out on a sofa, the young girl with red hair was talking loudly to two men, he could hear them talking about his leg and one of them began cleaning it with something which stung horribly and made Jon’s eyes water. They wrapped it with a bandage and once more Jon fell asleep. He awoke with a jolt when morning light flooded the farmhouse, he jumped again when his eyes opened to the girl watching him intensely her face inches from his. She stared at him and then turned and yelled.

‘Dad! Uncle Tormund! He’s awake.’

At that moment a great giant of a man appeared looking truly wild, he was the definition of what Catelyn would call a ‘mountain man’. He had a huge red beard and wild red hair, he looked over at Jon nodded at him and then walked straight past him into the kitchen. Jon could see him at the fridge from his position on the sofa, he opened the fridge and pulled out a carton of milk drinking it straight from the carton. Jon watched in disgust as the milk dripped down his beard and onto his shirt.  
Another man then appeared, similarly as large with long black hair and emerging stubble. He looked over at Jon and the girl.

‘How are you feeling boy?’ He asked coming to sit in an armchair opposite Jon, the girl moved to sit on the footstool in front of him.

‘Better.’ Jon managed to say and his eyes darted around the room anxiously looking for some sort of exit.

‘Gave us a bit of fright last night there. What were you doing wandering around out here that late at night?’

‘I-I was lost.’ Jon stuttered trying to avoid the intense stare of the girl.

‘Well, it’s a good thing Ygritte saw you out there otherwise we might not have found you until the morning and I can tell you it would have been a hell of a lot worse for you if that had happened.’

Jon nodded politely unsure of how to answer, but at least he now knew the name of the girl.

‘What’s your name then boy? And how did you get lost up around these parts?’

‘My name is Jon Stark, I, um, I had an argument with my step- with my dad’s wife and I got upset so I ran out of the house and I can run fast when I want to. I like to run to clear my head sometimes but I ran too far and I didn’t know where I was so I thought I’d keep walking until I found somewhere I recognized but then I was lost and it was dark but I saw your light and I thought you might help me.’

‘Stark? I used to work with a Stark, name of Benjen…’ He trailed off but Jon sat up excitedly wincing as he moved his leg.

‘My uncle is Benjen Stark!’

‘Really? You from Winterfell boy?’

Jon nodded and the man whistled softly.

‘You’re a long way from home boy, how the hell did you manage to get that far?’ He said the last part mainly to himself. ‘You crossed the border, you’re in the North, boy. The real North.’ He elaborated when he saw Jon’s perplexed expression. Jon tried hard to calm himself when his heart began racing.

‘Now then don’t panic, you’re not too far over the border we can have you back in Winterfell in no time. Now in the meantime, my name is Mance Rayder, you’ve met Ygritte already and that beast over there is Tormund who, for all intents and purposes, is my brother.’

‘Can I use your phone?’ Jon said eventually after the overload of information but Ygritte shook her head.

‘We don’t have a phone.’ She said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, ‘We have a radio but Uncle Tormund broke it and we haven’t got it working again.’

‘Don’t worry son we’ll get you home soon.’ Mance said but as soon as he had said that Tormund spoke up for the first time.

‘No, we won’t.’ He was stood by the window staring out in wonder.

‘What?’ Mance stood and joined Tormund adopting a similar expression.

‘Seven hells,’ He whispered, ‘looks like you’ll be staying with us, Jon, that snow isn’t stopping any time soon. Tormund work on that radio, he’s likely a missing person now and we need to inform the authorities soon that he’s here we don’t want anyone thinking there’s foul play involved especially when it concerns Benjen Stark’s nephew.’

He murmured the last part but Jon still heard him, he wanted to ask what that meant but Mance just turned smiling.

‘Keep him entertained, will you?’ He asked Ygritte and then he and Tormund left. Ygritte sat opposite Jon staring at him, she didn’t say anything, she just stared. If anything, it was beginning to unnerve Jon.

‘How old are you?’ She asked slowly tilting her head as if she were a cat stalking a mouse.

‘I’m thirteen,’ Jon said somewhat defensively, ‘But I’m fourteen in June.’ He added as if it was needed. Ygritte just stared.

‘Have you ever had a girlfriend?’

‘N-no?’ Jon stuttered almost like a question; he was so confused by her interrogation.

‘Ever kissed anyone?’

‘No? Well, I kissed Wylla Manderly when I was seven but that was on a dare and I only did it because if I didn’t Theon said he’d spread a rumour I still wet the bed, which I didn’t but everyone at school will believe anything Theon says and I didn’t want to risk it.’ Jon babbled quickly, Ygritte still just stared and Jon wasn’t sure what had compelled him to reveal so much.

‘Do you even know how to kiss someone?’

‘Course I do!’

‘Do you even like girls?’

‘Course I like girls!’

Ygritte threw her hands up in mock surrender.

‘Alright, it was only a question. Doesn’t bother me if you don’t, I just wondered. Uncle Tormund doesn’t just like girls you know, it’s fine if you don’t either.’

‘Well, I do like girls.’

‘Alright.’

They were silent once more and Ygritte went back to staring at him. For the first time Jon wished he was back in Winterfell being shouted at by Catelyn for running off, that he could handle, he knew she would calm down and begrudgingly apologize or they would forget about it. He could handle all of that, it was normal, but the way Ygritte just stared at him was so unnerving Jon couldn’t take it.

‘Why don’t you have a girlfriend?’ Ygritte asked and for once she didn’t sound like she was antagonizing him, she seemed genuinely curious. Jon shrugged.

‘I don’t know, just don’t. There isn’t anyone I’m interested in at school and besides Robb’s the ladies man, no one ever looks twice at me when they see Robb.’ He tried to keep the despondency and bitterness out of his voice when he said that but it was a struggle.

‘Who’s Robb?’ Ygritte asked wrinkling her nose in confusion.

‘My brother.’ Jon said shortly.

‘Are you twins?’

‘No, Robb’s three months older than me.’

‘How does that work?’

‘Different mums.’ Jon said flatly, he was sick to death of explaining it to everyone they ever met.

‘Is Robb your only brother?’

‘No, I’ve got two others, Bran and Rickon and two sisters, Sansa and Arya.’

‘Do you like having siblings?’ Ygritte looked almost envious when she asked him this.

‘Yeah, yeah I do.’ Jon said swallowing the lump in his throat as he thought of his siblings back in Winterfell with no idea where he was, I wonder if Sansa misses me? He thought, when she was young Sansa adored both him and Robb but as she got older and figured out why Jon was different in their family she had grown colder, it killed Jon to see the way she looked at him now.

‘I don’t have any siblings,’ Ygritte said and this time Jon could hear the envy in her voice, ‘Never had any parents either until Dad took me in, I suppose I could have siblings out there somewhere but I’d have no way of knowing.’

She stared off into the middle distance somewhere beyond Jon’s head not saying anything and Jon felt quite sorry for her but he didn’t say that he figured she wouldn’t take kindly to being pitied. She suddenly scooted off the foot stall and shuffled along the floor until she was inches from Jon’s face. Her blue eyes roamed over Jon’s face resting on his lips, Jon shifted uncomfortably unsure what to do. He couldn’t get up and leave, his leg was in too much pain, but at the same time there was something utterly compelling about Ygritte and there was a fluttering in Jon’s stomach as his own eyes drifted down to her lips. Ygritte leaned forward suddenly closing the gap between them and giving him a quick peck on the lips, she drew back swiftly leaving Jon stunned. She saw his expression, giggled and then returned to her perch on the footstool. Jon did not know what to do, he wasn’t entirely sure what had just happened.

‘What’s it like living on a farm?’ Jon asked awkwardly when he realised he couldn’t just stare at Ygritte dumbfounded forever. Ygritte shrugged.

‘It’s alright, beats sitting in school all day.’

‘You don’t go to school?’

‘No, Dad homeschools me.’

‘What do you do all day?’ Jon was curious, he couldn’t imagine Catelyn or his father ever letting any of them be homeschooled. Jon and his brother’s all attended the same school Ned had once attended.

‘Learn about the land, learn about the animals we keep, basic survival skills. That kind of thing.’

‘It’s not exactly useful is it?’

‘And algebra is?’

Jon didn’t reply, he supposed Ygritte did have a point.

*********

There was a loud banging on the front door causing Ned and Catelyn both to rush to it, they flung open the door to Benjen stood on their porch stomping the snow off his boots.

‘Any news?’ Ned asked breathlessly.

‘No,’ Benjen shook his head, ‘and they upgraded him from absent to missing officially after the night.’

‘What does that even mean?’ Catelyn didn’t mean to sound so frustrated but she was fed up of the police telling them things that she didn’t understand, throwing around words like ‘absent’ and ‘missing’ as far as she was concerned Jon was missing the minute he left the house but the police said he was simply absent.

‘It means the police are now actively investigating Jon’s whereabouts.’

‘And you’re not there leading it?’ Ned asked harshly.

‘I was taken off the case, Ned. I was deemed too emotionally involved with it and they’re right. I’ve been given compassionate leave and I’ll stay with you for a while, keep you company, and answer any questions you may have. The police are issuing a media campaign and they are doing everything they can to bring him home.’ Benjen sighed and placed a hand on his brother’s shoulder. ‘Ned, I know everyone on this squad personally, they’re good people and they’re doing everything they can to bring your boy home.’

Ned nodded dejectedly and Catelyn wondered just when he had gotten so old, it was as if he had aged overnight; his hair was greyer, his under eyes darker, his skin rougher but as they passed the hallway mirror and Catelyn caught a glimpse of herself, she realised she was not much better. They followed Benjen into the living room where the children were all seated, Catelyn had managed to get Bran inside, as soon as they entered Robb jumped up.

‘Is there any news?’

Catelyn shook her head and swallowed the lump in her throat.

‘No, but they are actively investigating his whereabouts and there’s now a media campaign.’

She tried to sound positive though she felt anything but. She watched as Robb’s face fell and he went to sit back down on the sofa. Catelyn’s eyes drifted to Ned who stood ashen-faced next to Benjen, she wanted nothing more than to go to him, to hold him and for him to hold her throughout all of this but she couldn’t. She knew she couldn’t. Ned glanced at his brother and jerked his head towards the kitchen.

‘Benjen, a word please.’

Benjen nodded and the two-headed out of the living room, Catelyn followed them but Ned stopped her as they reached the kitchen door.

‘No, Cat. Not this time.’ 

Benjen gave her an apologetic look but said nothing to Ned and instead followed him into the kitchen. Catelyn waited for a second debating what to do when the kitchen door closed in her face, feeling rather affronted she stood outside the door just staring at in until, against her better judgement, she moved closer and ignoring the hammering of guilt in her heart pressed her ear to the door. It was hard to hear through the solid oak but she caught small snippets of the conversation the two brothers were currently having.

‘Does the team know about Jon’s mother?’

‘No, of course not.’

‘You didn’t tell them?’

‘Give me some credit Ned, she was my sister too.’

‘I just thought…’

‘Thought what? That I’d betray your trust? Ned, I would never. It’s against my better judgement but I’ve kept that secret for thirteen years I’m not about to spill it now.’

‘What do you mean against your better judgement?’

‘Ned, we need to examine the possibility that Jon may not be alone out there.’

‘You’re suggesting kidnapping? He ran away Benjen…’

‘Initially, yes he did run. But this is Jon we’re talking about Ned; he would have come back and he hasn’t and I think there is a very real chance that there is more at stake here. Who else knows about his parentage?’

‘Just Howland Reed.’

‘No one else?’

‘No one else.’

Catelyn heard Benjen sigh.

‘I’m not sure that’s the case anymore. I won’t phone it in out of respect for you but if they don’t find him soon, then it is in my professional opinion that we tell the authorities the truth about Jon’s parents, there could be some very sinister characters at play here, Ned and I for one am not about to risk my nephews life on a promise you made to our sister. If Lyanna were here Ned she would want us to keep her son safe.’

‘Keeping Jon safe means keeping the true nature of his parents a secret, Ben! Why can’t you understand that? Lyanna made me promise to keep this secret on her death bed, it was her dying wish.’

‘Lyanna would want Jon to be safe, Ned, wake up he’s missing! And the true nature of his parents could very well be what’s keeping him from us.’ Benjen sighed heavily once more, ‘Just think on it is all I’m saying. I hope to the gods that I am wrong about this, I really do, Ned.’

Catelyn didn’t hear Ned’s reply but it was apparent that the conversation was over and she hurried back to the living room as silently as she could before Ned or Benjen realised she had been eavesdropping. Her heart hammered in her chest as Benjen and Ned re-entered the living room and her mind was racing. What did it all mean? What true nature of Jon’s parentage, and what did have to do with Lyanna? What was the promise Ned made to his sister on her deathbed? There were so many questions in Catelyn’s mind and the one person who held all the answers wouldn’t give them to her in a million years.


	2. Chapter 2

Jon jumped slightly when Mance and Tormund returned. Ygritte turned her head and acknowledged the return of her father and uncle with a slight nod of her head. She didn’t ask where they had gone although Jon desperately wanted to know but was too afraid to ask himself. Mance approached Jon and gestured down to his injured leg that was propped up with a number of cushions.

‘You mind if I take a look? I probably need to redress it.’ Jon saw that in his hand he held a first aid kit and although everything inside of him was screaming to not let Mance come anywhere near his leg, he also knew that infections were a nasty business and if he wanted to avoid that then he should let Mance redress his leg. He gave a tight nod and regarded Mance carefully who gently unwrapped the bandage on Jon’s leg and removed the wound dressing. Jon peered down to look at the wound for the first time, it was jagged and long and someone (Mance he guessed) had somewhat neatly stitched it up. The skin around it was tight and red and throbbed horribly causing Jon to wince as Mance gently probed it who swore under his breath as he looked at it.

‘Ygritte, go and get me some warm water and a clean cloth.’ He said sharply, ‘Now please.’ He admonished when she began to protest. Jon’s heart was beginning to hammer inside his chest, he was nervous and it had something to do with the way Mance was looking at his wound.

‘Get the honey too.’ Mance said as an afterthought. Jon had absolutely no idea why they would need honey, he had grown up in a house where if something was wrong with your health you went to the doctor and were treated in white sterile rooms on examination tables with thin paper coverings. The most Catelyn or his father had done as far as at home first aid went was stick plasters on their minor cuts and grazes, help them blow their noses when they had the flu and rubbed their backs if they vomited. Anything worse than that and they were taken to Doctor Lewin, their family GP who had been treating Starks since Jon’s father was a child. Jon felt some trepidation at what might happen next, whatever Mance had done to his leg the night he arrived, whilst it stung horribly, he had been mostly unconscious for it but now he was very much wide awake and aware of what was happening. And that made it all the more worse.

*********

Ned didn’t speak to any of them whilst they all waited and it became too much for Catelyn to bear so, she promptly stood and left their living room making to go to her study but instead stopping in front of the closed door of Ned’s. She had set foot in Ned’s study a grand total of five times over the course of their fifteen-year marriage it was an unspoken rule between them, but she was suddenly seized by a desire to break that rule and before she could talk herself out of it she was pushing open the door and stepping over the threshold. It wasn’t much to look at, average-sized with two neat bookcases and a good-sized desk covered in papers that Ned hadn’t had time to tidy before he had left. There was one filing cabinet against the back wall that Catelyn knew housed the children’s birth certificates and various other important documents. She knew what was in it and yet she couldn’t help herself from opening it and flicking through the documents; Robb Rickard Stark, Sansa Lyarra Stark, Arya Minisa Stark, Brandon Edric Stark, Rickon Hoster Stark, she flicked through the birth certificates of her children until she came upon the one she had been looking for;

Name: Jon Stark  
Date of Birth: 29 June 1986  
Mother: Lya Snow  
Father: Eddard Stark

She had seen it once before when Ned had presented it to her along with Jon himself, only three months old at the time. Catelyn could still keenly recall how her heart had turned to ice and how she had slammed the door in Ned’s face. It was there plain as day, his mother’s name Lya Snow, his father’s name Eddard Stark. No mention whatsoever of Lyanna Stark. But Catelyn wasn’t unintelligent and already the connection had formed in her mind; Lya and Lyanna. She didn’t let the thought fully form but she carefully placed Jon’s birth certificate back in its plastic wallet and began rooting around in the other drawers. She came up empty and moved her search towards the desk but found it only covered in work documents. She was at a bit of loss as to what to do until her eyes came to rest on the only framed picture Ned had on his wall. It was an old photograph, blown up larger so that its width was at least twenty inches. It was a photograph from Ned’s childhood when all of his siblings were still alive. Now Catelyn had seen plenty of heist films to know of the cliché of the safe hidden behind the picture frame and as she found herself moving towards it, she told herself how silly she was being, Ned wouldn’t hide a safe behind a picture frame. But nevertheless, she unhooked the picture from the wall and placed it quietly on the floor looking back at the wall to find a small safe embedded into the wall.

*********

Ygritte brought over the warm water, clean cloth, and honey. Mance took them from her and began to soak Jon’s wound in the warm water with the cloth. It stung, to begin with, and Jon hissed in pain but soon the pain dulled to an ache and the warm water was somewhat pleasant on it. Mance kept soaking Jon’s leg for some time until eventually he removed the cloth and wiped the wound dry. He then took a fresh dressing from the first aid kit and before placing it on Jon’s leg he dabbed some of the honey Ygritte had brought on it.

‘Honey kills bacteria.’ Mance explained before Jon could ask why he was doing this. It was an odd sensation but not entirely unpleasant.

‘I’ll check it again tomorrow.’ Mance said standing up and beginning to clear away everything he had used, he didn’t even say ‘if you’re here tomorrow’ it seemed to be a given that Jon would be staying with them for some time. 

‘Did you get the radio working again?’ Ygritte asked seemingly now disinterested in Jon. Tormund nodded.

‘Aye, that I did.’ Jon perked up immediately.

‘Have you contacted the authorities? Or my family, you said you knew my Uncle Benjen? Do they know where I am?’

‘Hold your horses, son. We tried but we couldn’t get through the snow’s wreaking havoc with the signal and I knew your uncle once yes, but it was a long time ago. A very long time ago.’

As Mance finished speaking there was great crash as one of the windows splintered and cracked from the force of a brick thrown through it causing Ygritte and Jon both to scream (but if asked both would deny it). Tormund immediately went into action picking up the shotgun from where it was propped against the wall by the front door and running out into the snow chasing whoever had thrown it away.

‘And don’t come back ya bastards!’ He yelled behind him as he came back inside stomping the snow from his feet. Jon was so shaken he only just noticed that Tormund had gone outside with no shoes on. Mance shook his head and gently picked up the brick from where it lay on the floor inches from where Ygritte sat. He brushed the broken glass from it as Ygritte jumped up and grabbed a broom and began sweeping up the glass.

‘Leave it, Ygritte. Let Tormund do it.’ Mance said unwrapping a paper note that was wrapped around the brick as Tormund took the broom from Ygritte who sat back down on the footstool. Mance shook his head as he read the note aloud.

‘ “Die wildling scum.” ’ He said, his voice tired and resigned, ‘that’s the fifth one this month.’ 

‘Who were they?’ Jon asked embarrassed as his voice cracked.

‘Southerners, some of your lot.’ Ygritte spat bitterly.

‘My lot?’ Jon began incredulously but Mance interrupted him to keep the peace.

‘People south of the border. We’re close to a number of small villages and hamlets here that don’t take to kindly to us, they think we’re some kind of threat to them.’ Mance explained, Tormund snorted loudly.

‘They know nothing, if they ever set foot in the north properly, they would know there are much bigger threats than us.’

‘Tormund!’ Mance said sharply and Tormund stopped talking making Jon wonder what was out there that was such a big threat. Tormund stopped sweeping once he’d swept the glass into one big pile.

‘I’m going to find something to patch up the window.’ He said gruffly and left. It seemed like a good idea to Jon though who was beginning to fill the cold effects of the broken window while a small smattering of snow was gathering just below the window. He came back with some pallets of wood and a hammer and nails. He then began to hammer the wood over the open window until the light was blocked out completely and the snow wasn’t coming inside. 

*********

Catelyn contemplated the safe for some time as inside her head both sides of the argument waged war. If she opened it she broke her husband’s trust perhaps irretrievably but he was clearly hiding something from her, proof maybe that he didn’t trust her anyway? Eventually, the distraught feelings of worry she felt for Jon, the anger and hurt directed at her husband, and the sheer curiosity won out and she reached for the dial pausing as she tried to think what the combination might be. She tried Ned’s birthday, her birthday, their anniversary, any of the children’s birthdays, their debit card pin number coming up at a loss with all of them. She paused for a moment longer before trying Lyanna’s birthday and with a simple quiet click the safe swung open to reveal a baby’s blanket, a pile of documents, and some photos. She pulled out the documents and was immediately greeted with Lyanna’s death certificate, she shifted feeling suddenly guilty but she persevered and moved to the next document a certificate of marriage for a one Lyanna Stark and a one Rhaegar Targaryen. Catelyn’s heart dropped to her stomach, she knew Lyanna and Rhaegar had been involved up until his death, everyone knew that it was the talk across Westeros when Rhaegar and Lyanna ran away with each other but she hadn’t known that they married or even that Rhaegar and Elia had divorced. She glanced at the date of the marriage, the twenty-sixth of August 1985, the day after Lyanna turned eighteen. She felt vaguely sick but she ploughed on to the next document which was a birth certificate she scanned over it and her blood ran cold.

Name: Jon Rhaegar Targaryen  
Date of Birth: 29 June 1986  
Mother: Lyanna Stark  
Father: Rhaegar Targaryen

Catelyn carefully stacked the documents and placed them back as she had found them, quietly closed the safe and placed the picture frame back on the wall. She tip-toed out of the study and shut the door silently and then walked quickly into her own study where she sat in her chair and grabbed a book, any book, so that if anyone came looking it would look as if she had been there the whole time. Her heart pounded in her chest and she tried to mull over what she knew in her mind. Jon was Lyanna and Rhaegar’s son. Lyanna and Rhaegar were married. Jon was not Ned’s son but rather his nephew. Ned had never had an affair. Jon wasn’t Ned’s son. She had treated. Jon the way she had because she had thought he was the product of Ned’s affair but Ned hadn’t had an affair. She had shunned an innocent child from her love on the basis of a lie. It was an awful truth even if Jon was Ned’s biological child but the fact that it was based on a lie turned   
Catelyn’s stomach. Ned had stood by and watched her leave Jon out of everything, watched as she showered her own children with love but treat Jon with only the barest amount of care knowing that this treatment was built upon a lie. How did you do it, Ned? She thought how did you watch me treat your nephew this way knowing that if I had known it would be different? She tried to think of reasons as to why Ned would keep such a secret, going through the facts that she   
was sure of; Lyanna and Rhaegar ran away together in the summer of 1983, Brandon and Rickard Stark confronted Aerys Targaryen over it, he killed them in a fit of rage, Rhaegar mysteriously reappeared in the fall of 1985 where he was promptly arrested for kidnapping and awaiting the results of his appeal to his prison sentence when he was killed by a fellow inmate at King’s Landing Penitentiary rumoured to have been working for Robert Baratheon. It was no secret that the Targaryen’s were hated by almost everyone and an attempt had been made on the lives of Rhaegar’s ex-wife Elia and their two children shortly after his arrest and they had fled to Dorne to be with Elia’s family who had the riches to hire necessary protection. Was that why Ned had kept Jon’s parentage a secret? Out of fear for his life? A knock on the door made her jump and she dropped her book in the process. Robb pushed open the door as she scrambled on the floor for the book.

‘Are you okay?’ He asked staring as she hurried to her feet. Catelyn nodded.

‘Yes, yes I’m fine,’ She said impatiently, ‘has there been news?’

‘No, I just wondered where you went.’ Robb said, ‘You just disappeared.’

‘Oh, yes I suppose I did.’ Catelyn searched for an explanation, ‘I just needed some time alone. It’s been a very stressful time.’

Robb nodded in understanding and then he frowned.

‘Mum, I just wanted to ask- I don’t know,’ He seemed to struggle for the right words until finally, he landed on them and they tumbled out in one great rush, ‘you don’t even like Jon.’

Catelyn blinked in surprise. Whatever she had been expecting Robb to say it wasn’t that. She opened her mouth to reply and then closed it shamefully when she realised she had no words.

‘I- it’s complicated Robb.’ She said finally.

‘No, it’s not.’ He replied.

‘It is, Robb. I don’t expect you to understand you’re only young.’

‘I’m fourteen next month!’ Robb exclaimed and despite it all, Catelyn had to fight the small smile that threatened to grace her lips at Robbs exclamation.

‘Yes, you are. I suppose you’re not as young as you used to be. But it is very complicated and messy. I don’t dislike Jon and I admit I don’t treat him the same way I treat you and your siblings but his very existence is tied to very painful and humiliating memories for me.’ She paused carefully considering her words. ‘I know that isn’t an excuse but I hope you know that I don’t dislike your brother, Robb. I did raise him, almost by myself god knows your father wasn’t around an awful lot when you were both young, so I do like Jon and I am extremely worried about him.’

Robb said nothing just regarded her with such intense scrutiny that Catelyn almost wanted to hide, it was rare that Robb resembled Ned but, at that moment, there was a certain air of his father about him. He stopped regarding her seeming to accept her explanation and he turned to go.

‘We’re all still in the living room if you want to rejoin us.’ He said and then he left and Catelyn was alone once more.

*********

Tormund finished blocking up the broken window and stomped out of the room muttering under his breath words that would have made Catelyn white in the face if she ever heard Robb or Jon repeating them. Ygritte sat rigid and straight-backed on the footstool, she was already very pale but her white face was even whiter and her hands were clasped tightly as she stared straight ahead unblinking. Mance finished sweeping up the glass, tipping it into a bin and putting away the broom. Jon watched all three of unsure of how to help or what to say, he couldn’t help that feel that as someone who lived south of the border that his help wouldn’t be much appreciated. He had grown up on stories of those who lived north of the border, ‘wildlings’ as they were known although in school, they were now being taught not to refer to them that way as it was seen as a slur. Jon knew his father had worked hard in the past to improve free folk (as they called themselves) and northerner relations but on the most part tensions were high between them. Theon often liked to taunt Jon by saying Jon’s mother must have been wildling for him to turn out so stupid and ugly. Robb would often reprimand him but Theon said it enough for it to sting. They sometimes had free folk come south of the border and attack people mainly in the villages that sat on the border but it wasn’t often. 

Jon had never considered that the same might happen to the free folk, he suddenly felt very small and helpless and he missed home. He squeezed his eyes shut trying to imagine his home and what it was like back there, were they worried? Were they looking for him? Even though he was thirteen, a teenager, he wanted his dad here with him to hug him and tell him it was all alright, he wanted it to be Catelyn redressing his leg wound the way she placed plasters on his grazed and scabby knees when he was a little. He wanted Robb on the sofa with him talking non-stop pausing here and there to let Jon say something before continuing, he wanted Arya to throw her arms around him giving him one of her ‘bear hugs’ and he wanted Sansa to be sat opposite him reading her book. He wanted to look out of the window to see Bran climbing the trees in their back garden and he wanted Rickon to be babbling away in his baby speak. To his embarrassment, he felt tears spring in his eyes and he discreetly tried to wipe them away but Mance had already noticed.

‘You alright there, Jon? Is it your leg?’

‘No, no. I’m alright, it’s nothing.’ He replied rubbing at his eyes furiously.

‘You look like you’re crying.’ Ygritte said her face was regaining some of its original colour.

‘I’m not crying!’ Jon said defensively and Ygritte opened her mouth to retort but Mance raised a warning hand in her direction shushing her.

‘It’s alright, Jon. Nothing to be ashamed of, we’ll have you home soon. Soon as we can get a hold of someone through the radio.’

‘And what if you can’t?’ Jon said his voice small and quiet as he stared down at the old, worn sofa he lay on.

‘Then we’ll just walk you back to Winterfell ourselves soon as this storm clears up.’ Mance sounded much more optimistic than Jon felt.

It was later in the night when everything seemed to go wrong. It was dark outside and Jon shifted on the sofa trying to get comfortable but not jostle his leg so much, the throbbing was much duller now but still, it kept him awake. As he shifted, he felt something hard in his pocket, he reached in and pulled out a small, insignificant-looking stone with a small ‘A’ painted on it. He rolled it between his fingers, feeling the rough surface of it catch against his fingertips. A memory floated to the forefront of his mind of Arya pressing it into his hand the day he left, was it yesterday? His mind was hazy and the details sparse but he could see Arya so clearly as she ran in from the garden holding the stone.

‘Jon!’ She yelled so loudly that Jon heard Catelyn’s muffled voice from the kitchen telling Arya to use her inside voice which his sister ignored and continued speaking at the same volume.

‘Look what I did!’ She pressed the stone into his hands and on studied it diligently his fingers working over the wonky ‘A’ that had been painted on. ‘I used Sansa’s paints, so don’t tell her but you can take it to school with you so I’ll be there with you.’ 

She grinned and Jon remembered how much she had cried when she started school and found she wouldn’t go to the same one as Jon. Now eight years old she appeared to have gotten over it but Jon watched her expression as his hand closed over the stone.

‘I love it.’ He told her sincerely and her face lit up.

The memory left as quickly as it had come and Jon felt sleep tug at his eyes which felt slow and heavy-lidded. He thought maybe he could smell something cooking or burning but he was so warm that he didn’t pay it any attention as he slipped away.

Hands grabbed at him and he jolted awake. He was being carried out of the house. He struggled but it was no use so he stared at the night sky that glowed bright orange from the flames. The flames! He turned in the arms that held him and the sight of the farmhouse on fire greeted him. It burned as brightly as Ygritte and Tormund’s hair and indeed in the light of the fire the hair seemed luminous. The further away they got from the fire the clearer Jon’s mind became and he realised that Mance was carrying him and that he also had no shoes on. His hand scrambled for his pocket but came up empty, Arya’s stone had been left behind. He struggled again trying to get down but Mance held on tight. Not tightly enough, Jon struggled enough that he fell. He hit the ground and made to run back to the farmhouse but the searing pain in his leg caused him to stumble and fall. Mance’s arms were around him once more.

‘Jon, don’t! It’s gone we can’t go back.’

‘But…’ Jon tried to struggle some more but his strength was fading fast, how did he explain that all he wanted was a small rock with a tiny, wonky ‘A’ painted on it?

‘I’m not wearing any shoes.’ He said eventually.

‘No, you’re not.’ Mance said wearily, ‘it happened so fast we didn’t have the time, we’ll find you some shoes don’t worry son.’

‘What happened?’ Ygritte asked it was the first time Jon had heard her speak all night.

‘Fucking southerners.’ Tormund spat angrily, ‘Come back to finish what they started.’

A chill ran through Jon, this was the reality of Tormund and Ygritte and free folk like them. Sometimes it was stupid teenagers having what they thought was a laugh and sometimes it was people actively trying to kill them.

‘Where are we going, Dad?’ Ygritte asked and her voice sounds so small as she stared at the still-burning farmhouse, the flames reflected back in her eyes. For some reason, Jon thought Mance might say Winterfell but it was a foolish thought.

‘I have some friends a bit further north, not too far from hear. They’ll take us in tonight.’ He answered.

‘What about…?’ Jon began but did not finish his sentence, he wanted to ask what about me? But he was scared of the answer.

‘We’ll get you home eventually, Jon but for now, we need somewhere to go for tonight otherwise we’ll die out here.’ He said it was such finality that Jon knew there would be no more talking, Mance picked him up once more even though Jon was thirteen but he knew he wouldn’t be able to walk and he was grateful that he didn’t have to ask to be carried. They began walking into the night.

*************************

Benjen’s face was rigid and white when he returned from being called out to the station in the early hours of the morning. Catelyn had been sat with her children on the sofa, all huddled together by the phone, they stood immediately when Ned opened the door to Benjen who walked in stamping the snow from his boots and shrugging his coat off.

‘There was a fire,’ he began his voice cracking and he cleared it noisily, ‘there was a fire at a farmhouse just across the border. Mance Rayder was said to be living there, they, uh.’ He stopped talking and cleared his throat again.

‘They found a child’s pair of shoes there, one of the only things that survived the fire. They had Jon’s name in them. There were no bodies found so he might not be…’

He didn’t finish the sentence; he didn’t have to they all knew what was being implied. Catelyn’s hands flew to her mouth and her mind hurtled along wildly. There was a fire, Jon had been there, Jo could be dead, Jon might not be dead, Jon was Lyanna’s son, Jon was Rhaegar Targaryen’s son. Jon could be dead, Jon might not be dead. It was all her fault.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Long time no see! If anyone is still reading this then I apologise for the long wait between chapters, life got really busy for a while there and I just didn't have time to write anything. I don't know when I'll have the next chapter up but hopefully, it won't be another five months wait!! Hope you enjoy this new chapter and hope everyone is staying home (if you're able to) and staying safe during the epidemic xx

Despite how cold it was, Jon drifted in and out of sleep the whole night as Mance carried him through the dark night further and further north. Ygritte started out walking but on one of the occasions that Jon woke, he saw that Tormund was carrying her. He was asleep when they finally arrived at their destination and he didn’t realise that they had arrived until he awoke in the morning. He was in a small twin bed and sleeping in the bed next to him was Ygritte. She looked much more peaceful when she was sleeping, less angry and aggressive. Jon flicked his eyes away quickly, an uneasy feeling settling in his stomach when he was watching her. He quietly slipped out of bed and hissed as his bare feet hit the cold stone floor shocking him. He glanced over at Ygritte once more but she remained fast asleep. Jon decided against waking her, if the dark circles under her eyes were any indication then she needed the sleep. 

He left the small room and walked out into a small living area with a roaring fire over which a pot of something bubbled away. He turned fully once taking in his surroundings and saw that they seemed to be in a stone hut of some kind. Perplexed still, he made his way over to the front door and eased it open slowly, he was greeted suddenly by what could only be described a small town of these huts. They must have been in the far north now; all Jon could see was snow for miles and even then, he couldn’t tell where the white sky stopped and the snow began save for the black smoke drifting out of the chimneys. He cautiously took a step out, his feet burning as they touched the freezing snow, his leg ached as well but he ignored the pain as he walked towards the largest of the huts which, now that his sleepy mind was becoming sharper, he could see that the other huts were arranged so that this larger hut was at the centre of the dwelling. 

He peered into the window of the hut and saw many people gathered together listening to someone talk, he looked closer and saw that it was Mance they were listening to and behind him stood Tormund looking menacing his eyes flicking around the room. Suddenly they caught Jon’s eyes and Jon ducked down a fraction too late. He heard Tormund’s heavy footfalls from where he crouched outside and he heard the door fly open. Tormund grabbed him by the scruff of the neck on his jumper, dragging him upright. 

‘What do you think you’re doing boy?’ He growled as Jon struggled against him.

‘I just wanted to see what was going on!’ Jon said, his voice came out in short bursts as he continued to fight against Tormund to no avail. He stopped wrestling Tormund’s firm hand on his jumper once he realised he wouldn’t win.

‘Get back inside, this isn’t meant for your ears.’ Tormund said giving Jon a forceful shove back towards the hut where Ygritte still slept.

‘I don’t want to go inside; I want to go home!’ Jon shouted all of his pent-up frustration and homesickness bubbling up at once.

‘Well, you can’t go home!’ Tormund yelled back grabbing Jon’s arm painfully. He yelled so loudly that the door to the hut where Mance was flung open and Mance himself stood in the doorway.

‘Tormund, let Jon go.’ He commanded, his voice even and level. Tormund turned his head angrily towards Mance, his nostrils flaring, and Jon watched as a silent exchange took place between the two men until eventually, he dropped Jon and stomped away breathing heavily. The shock of Tormund letting go caused Jon to stumble backwards slightly. It was just Mance and Jon outside now as Tormund ushered the other free folk who had gathered at the doorway of the hut back inside. Jon was painfully aware of his bare feet now as the biting cold of the snow burned them and he hopped from foot to foot. Mance glanced down at Jon’s feet and saw he wasn’t wearing shoes.

‘Come now, let’s get you inside.’

He walked with Jon back to the hut Jon had woken up in and once they were inside Jon immediately sat in front of the fire wincing and grimacing as the intense warmth of the fire drew the cold out of his feet.

‘What were you doing wandering around in the snow in bare feet?’

‘It’s not my fault I was barefoot.’ Jon huffed, ‘You left my shoes in the farmhouse.’ 

Mance sighed and leant forward, his hands clasped in front of him. Jon recognized the pose as one his own father had adopted many times when he reprimanded Jon and Robb. 

‘Jon, I think we’ve been very patient with you. I know it been hard for you but now it’s time for you to be patient with us.’

‘I just want to go home.’ Jon said as he had said to Tormund but this time he did not shout and his voice came out in a cracked whisper as a lump formed in his throat that he desperately tried to swallow down.

‘And you will, eventually.’ Mance countered.

‘I want to go home now. I don’t understand why I can’t it’s not snowing anymore and all you’ve done is take me even further away.’

Mance sighed and dropped his head, staring down at his clasped hands.

‘Jon, I’m going to be honest with you but you must understand, I want you to go home to your family as much as you do, but after last night… this is something that I had to take to the free folk, they deserve to be a part of the decision I make.’ He paused and fixed Jon with an intense stare. ‘You’re a very interesting young boy Jon and your very existence is far more powerful than you know. Very strange circumstances surrounding your birth.’

‘What are you talking about?’ Jon burst out in frustration.

‘Did you ever wonder how Ned Stark came to have an affair? The honourable Ned Stark, do you think he woke up one day and decided to abandon the vows he took before the gods when he took Catelyn Tully as his wife?’

‘It was a mistake, he told me. He called it a lapse in judgement.’ Jon said with more conviction than he felt.

‘Did he really?’ Mance paused again and Jon watched as he weighed up what he would say next, ‘Look the truth is Jon, we can’t let you go right now. I know you want to go home and I promise no harm will come to you, but we are in the unique position here to try reap the benefits of this situation. To improve our lives, you saw what the people south of the border do to us we’re just asking for some basic humanity here and if that means keeping you with us a bit longer until those demands are met then so be it.’

‘So you’re kidnapping me?’ Jon wasn’t stupid, contrary to what the older boys at school thought or what Theon said to him, and he could see through Mance’s word.

‘It’s not kidnapping Jon, you won’t be harmed in any way.’

‘But you won’t let me leave.’

‘No, we won’t let you leave and don’t get any ideas about trying to run yourself, you won’t get very far especially with your leg. Look, Jon don’t worry about it, you’ll be well looked after and if your family are smart then you’ll be home in no time.’ With that Mance stood and with a final nod to Jon he left the hut leaving Jon to his swirling thoughts. His first thought was to run but Mance was right he wouldn’t get very far at all. He had no choice but to stay.

************  
Catelyn sat next to Ned in the police station as Benjen spoke in hushed tones to various members of the squad tasked with finding Jon. They had been there for hours already, first they’d had to identify Jon’s shoes and then Chief Inspector Mormont had described to them the scene that his squad had found just over the border detailing the route they believed Jon to have taken to get there. And now they were waiting. And waiting. And waiting. There had been a flurry of activity almost an hour ago and no one was telling them anything.

‘I can’t stand this waiting any longer.’ Catelyn muttered to Ned as she fidgeted in her uncomfortable seat clutching a cup of undrunk tea that had long since gone cold. ‘Why won’t they tell us anything? We’re his parents for crying out loud, we deserve to know what’s going on.’

‘We’re not his parents, Cat, I’m his parent.’ Ned said frostily.

‘Fine, but you’re still his father and I’m his step-mother they should be including us or at the very least including you in what’s happening.’

‘Cat, leave it, stop complaining.’

‘Don’t get funny with me, Ned. I was merely stating a fact.’

‘Catelyn, my son is dead-,’

‘You don’t know that!’ Catelyn interrupted raising her voice, ‘they never found a body or any trace of… remains.’ She finished delicately, she had more to say but then Benjen walked over to them and they immediately jumped up. Catelyn drew in breath sharply as she took in Benjen’s ashen face.

‘He’s…’ Benjen paused to take in a shuddering breath, ‘he’s not dead.’

‘Oh my…’ Catelyn trailed off as relief washed over her, she felt Ned sit heavily back down in his chair as she heard him muttering prayers of thanks.

‘But we can’t get to him.’

‘What do you mean?’ Catelyn asked when Ned didn’t say anything, she reached down without looking placing her hand on his shoulder.

‘It seems that Jon has somehow ended up with a large community of free folk led by Mance Rayder, we don’t know where they are all we know is they refuse to give Jon over unless certain demands are met.’

‘What sort of demands?’

‘The usual; complete independence from Westeros, proper retribution towards those who commit crimes against the free folk etc. But Ned, you know only one person can grant those demands and he never will.’

‘Robert.’ Ned sighed, his head in his hands and Catelyn felt her heart sink. Robert Baratheon, the president of Westeros, the only person who had the power to grant Mance Rayder’s demands was also the only person who never would.

‘Unless…’ Benjen began and then trailed off immediately as Ned’s head whipped up and he stared daggers at him.

‘Absolutely not.’

‘Ned…’

‘I said no, Benjen!’ Ned’s shout startled Catelyn and she saw some of the other police officers startle too as Ned’s words reverberated around the station. Catelyn watched as a myriad of emotions flitted across Benjen’s face. 

‘Follow me.’ Benjen eventually said and he led them to a small, secluded room where no one else would follow. Only once the door had closed behind them did Benjen speak.

‘Ned, I have held my tongue long enough.’

‘Benjen, please don’t do this.’ Ned implored and all Catelyn could do was watch the two brothers as they argued back and forth.

‘She deserves to know!’ Benjen said angrily.

‘I already know.’ Catelyn said so quickly she surprised herself, Benjen and Ned stopped arguing immediately and turned slowly to face her, ‘I overheard you talking about… it and then I found Jon’s birth certificate. His real one.’

‘Cat…’ Ned said his voice breaking, betrayal apparent on his face, ‘you had no right.’

‘You had no right to lie to me for thirteen years!’

‘Cat, you have to understand, Lyanna made me promise never to tell anyone.’

‘Anyone? I am your wife, Ned, I’m not anyone. Instead you chose to let me suffer through the humiliation and heartbreak of believing you had betrayed me. I could have helped you keep it a secret, did you not trust me?’

‘It was my sister’s dying wish, Cat! There was nothing I could do besides what would you have done had you found out?’

‘I could have helped you! I could have been kinder to Jon if I had known he wasn’t the product of your affair.’

‘You should have been kinder to him anyway.’

‘I know that, Ned!’ Catelyn snapped, ‘but how could you stand by and watch me treat him as I did, knowing it was built upon a lie?’

Ned opened his mouth to reply and then closed it and Catelyn watched as shame fell upon his face.

‘I just wanted to protect him,’ he said resigned and quiet, ‘I don’t know what might happen to him if this gets out, you remember what happened to Elia Martell and her children.’

‘Thing’s might be different now.’ Catelyn tried to say but Ned cut her off.

‘They won’t be.’ He said shortly.

‘How do you know that?’ Benjen said incredulously.

‘Because it was Robert who ordered the murder of Rhaegar Targaryen and Robert who ordered the attempt on Elia Martell and her children’s lives.’

There was silence as Catelyn and Benjen took in what Ned was saying.

‘Why didn’t you say anything?’ Benjen asked and as Catelyn looked at him, she saw in his eyes the respect he held for Ned shattering.

‘Benjen, you were a child when everything happened, you didn’t see what Robert was like when Lyanna left. I’ve never seen a man act that way and he’s the most powerful man in all of Westeros to go against that would have put us all in danger and Cat,’ he turned to Catelyn and she saw in his eyes how he was begging her to understand, ‘you were pregnant with Robb, I wouldn’t have just been putting myself in danger it would have been you and Robb as well. I couldn’t do that. Do you see why I had to keep the truth about Jon a secret? The less people who knew the better.’

‘Who does know?’ Catelyn asked after she was silent for some time mulling over what Ned had said.

‘Myself, Benjen, Howland Reed, and now you. If anyone else knows then I don’t know about it.’

‘Is there any possibility that this Mance Rayder could know?’ Catelyn asked trying to understand everything that she had learnt.

‘He won’t know for certain but he’s a clever man, it wouldn’t take much for him to suspect that the story about Jon isn’t as it seems.’ Benjen said and the three of them fell silent thinking over the implications of what Benjen had said. Catelyn’s own mind was racing, there was just so much to take in, only an hour ago they had believed Jon to be dead and now he was being held captive north of the border where they were unable to get to him. She could feel herself starting to lose control slightly and she steeled herself, family, duty, honour she thought, reminding herself of her family’s words. You are a Tully, Catelyn, and Tully’s do not lose sight of family.

‘What do we do?’ She asked and she saw the surprise in both Benjen and Ned’s eyes at her determination. 

‘We get him back.’ Benjen said, his jaw set. ‘I can take a small team across the border, it doesn’t have to be official.’ He added when he saw Ned’s expression.

‘I want Jon back more than any of you but I’m worried, Ben, we’ve been working so hard to try and improve free folk and northerner relations. This could tip it over the edge and they have Jon, we don’t know what they might do if they find out.’

‘Which is why it wouldn’t be official; I know of at least four or five other police officers who would be willing to come with me. I also knew Mance not too long ago, he was my mentor when I first started at the force, and he’s not vindictive or out for revenge. He also wouldn’t harm Jon.’

‘He’s kidnapped him, Ben!’ Catelyn exclaimed, won’t harm him, my ass she thought.

‘Yes, but he is somewhat rationale and I believe he can be reasoned with.’

‘This is incredibly risky, Benjen.’ Ned said, his brow furrowed and more serious than Catelyn had ever seen him.

‘What other choice do we have Ned?’

‘You’re young, you’re reckless, you want to be the one to bring him home. I get it Ben, I really do but you’re not thinking things through.’

‘I’m not being reckless and I’m not too young, I’m not a child anymore in case you haven’t noticed, Ned.’

‘I know you’re not a child, Benjen. I’m simply saying that this is an incredibly risky plan besides if anyone is crossing the border it should be me since I’m the only one who has any kind of covert training.’

Catelyn could not stand this back and forth argument the two brothers were having but she had no way of stopping it, she had to admit that so far Benjen’s idea was the best they had come up with.

‘You’re not even listening to me Ned! Why can’t you just trust for once that I know what I’m doing?’ Benjen shouted.

‘Because I don’t trust that you know what you’re doing! You’re just a kid, Benjen!’ Ned shouted back and then there was deathly silence. Catelyn glanced between the two brothers, one older and weary his face grey and lined, the other young and brash his face red with anger and frustration.

‘Well, your true feelings had to come to light eventually and now we all know how you really see me.’ Benjen said laughing hollowly.

‘Benjen, that’s not what I meant-,’ Ned began but Benjen cut him off.

‘I will always be the kid brother who didn’t tell you that Lyanna had run away until it was too late.’

‘Benjen, don’t be like this. I didn’t mean it that way, you’re my younger brother, I only want to protect you.’

‘From what, Ned? I’m an adult I can handle myself!’ Benjen shouted but Ned didn’t reply and at that Benjen left the room slamming the door behind him. 

‘Was that really necessary?’ Cat began but Ned cut her off.

‘Don’t start Cat.’

‘He’s going to do it anyway, you know that, he’s probably getting that team together as we speak.’

‘I know.’ Ned said shortly and the two of them stood awkwardly in silence until Ned took a deep breath. ‘Look, Cat… about Jon… I just want to say-,’

‘Unless the next words out of your mouth undo the last fourteen years of lies then save your breath.’ Catelyn said cutting him off abruptly and Ned had the good sense to look ashamed. Although anger still coursed through Catelyn’s body she couldn’t help but want to comfort him, it was purely instinctual, but she fought down the urge and made towards the door. 

‘We should probably leave.’ She said and heard Ned follow her out. They made their way back to the foyer where Benjen was discreetly talking to a young officer but as soon as he saw them the conversation ceased and the young officer hurried off quickly.

‘We’re going to head home and tell the kids the news.’ Catelyn said addressing Benjen as Ned pointedly looked away. Benjen nodded, his jaw set.

‘Do you want me to come too?’ He asked, his tone stiff and proper.

‘No.’ Ned said sharply and then clearing his throat, ‘We’ll be fine, thank you.’ Benjen nodded again and turned to leave but Ned grabbed his arm, letting go of it quickly once he had Benjen’s attention.

‘Ben, whatever it is you’re planning…’ He paused, ‘Just be careful.’

‘You ought to watch what you say, Ned, someone might hear that and think you care.’ Benjen replied coolly, then he turned on his heel and left. Ned raised his hand as if to grab Benjen and stop him but just left it hovering there until he ran his hand through his hair. 

‘Ned, let’s go home.’ Catelyn said softly, Ned sighed and nodded, walking past her and out of the police station. Catelyn followed him, wondering how they were going to explain everything to their children.

*********  
Jon sat stewing angrily in front of the fire when Ygritte walked in yawning and rubbing at her eyes.

‘What’s got you in such a mood?’ She asked nudging Jon over so she too could sit in front of the fire.

‘I’m not in a mood.’ Jon muttered wrapping his arms tightly around his knees.

‘Yes, you are.’ Ygritte countered.

‘Your dad!’ Jon burst out angrily, ‘Your dad is the reason why I’m angry. He won’t let me go home because apparently I’m a valuable bargaining chip for him, so I’m basically a prisoner here.’

‘Don’t be stupid, my dad wouldn’t do that.’ Ygritte scoffed.

‘I’m not being stupid, he told me to my face that he wouldn’t let me leave until the free folk have gotten what they ask for.’

‘My dad wouldn’t do that.’ Ygritte said again sharply, ‘He knows what its like to be a prisoner, to be held against your will. He wouldn’t do that to you, you’ve obviously misunderstood.’

‘What part of your dad won’t let me leave don’t you understand? I’m not being stupid, I didn’t misunderstand anything he told me I was not allowed to leave, that seems pretty fucking clear to me!’ Jon raised his voice pushing himself so he was stood over Ygritte, who jumped up immediately so her eyes were level with Jon’s.

‘He wouldn’t just do that to you! There has to be a reason, one you clearly don’t understand.’ 

‘Apparently, it was a unanimous vote from the free folk that keeping me here was in their best interests.’ Jon said darkly and Ygritte turned away, shaking her head.

‘You don’t know what it’s been like for us, you don’t know what it’s like the wonder where your next meal is coming from or to have your house burned to the ground or people who wish you dead. Did you know that Westeros doesn’t recognize the free folk as an established nation of people? Do you know what that’s like to be denied your own identity?’ Ygritte shouted and then she sighed, finishing softly ‘That’s what it’s like being us, we’re only asking for basic rights here.’ 

Jon sighed his anger dissipating somewhat.

‘You’re not going to get basic rights by holding me prisoner. All that will happen is they’ll send the police or an army to find me, more free folk will die and then it will add to the reputation that the free folk are “savages”.’ 

‘How do you know that?’

‘I’m not important enough, I’m the bastard son of a northern lord if I was my brother, Robb then maybe it might work but I’m worth nothing to Westeros.’ Jon said and Ygritte was silent, Jon could see she was thinking deeply.

‘And you’re sure nothing will change if we keep you here?’ She said slowly.

‘Positive.’ Jon replied, ‘Trust me on this, I’m worth nothing to Robert Baratheon, he won’t even remember my name. Look I want you to get what’s owed to you, truly I do, but I’m no help if I’m here, if I can get home then maybe I can talk to my dad about the kindness the free folk showed me. Ygritte, I just want to go home, can you talk to Mance please? He might listen to you.’

‘He won’t listen to me.’ Ygritte shook her head and rubbed a hand agitatedly across her forehead when suddenly her head snapped up and she ran to the hut door, sticking her head out and looking around. She turned to Jon and locked eyes with him she looked like she might say something but then her eyes flicked away and she began pacing. She paced for some time and Jon stayed silent, unsure of what to do.

‘I want to make this real clear before we go through with anything,’ Ygritte began walking over to Jon until her face was inches from his. ‘I don’t like you. I don’t like your people, and I believe in the free folks cause but I know I would want to go home if it were me. So, I’m going to help you on one condition.’

‘What?’

‘Never tell anyone I helped you and if we get caught, I’m going to say you threatened me.’ She said and Jon nodded aware of what he might be getting himself in to.

‘Ok, good. I’ll wake you when I think everyone’s gone to sleep tonight and then we’ll leave.’ She turned away from Jon and sat back down in front of the fire indicating that their conversation was over.

It was much later when they finally left. So late that the sky was inky black and illuminated by hundreds of thousands of tiny stars, spattered across like paint on a canvas. Ygritte and Jon snuck out of their hut silently, carrying packs with food and sleeping bags in them, even a tightly compacted tent that Ygritte had stolen from a supply hut. They made their way to the outskirts of the commune where some horses grazed. They carefully mounted the horses and rode off into the night.


End file.
